[Intro]
N.C
This, as you might have guessed, is the end of the movie.
N.C.
The entire cast is assembled here at the Centerville Recreational Facility to bid farewell to you,
N.C.
and to express thanks for your attendance at this theater. This might seem old fashioned to some of you,
N.C.
but I'd like to join in on this song. It's the kind of a sentimental song that you get at the end of a movie,
N.C.
it's the kind of a song that people might sing to let you in the audience know that we really like you and
N.C.
care about you, yeah... Understand how hard it is to laugh these days, with all the
N.C.
terrible problems in the world!
[Verse 1]
D A E F#
Lord, have mercy on the people in England
D G E A
For the terrible food these people must eat
D A E F#
And may the Lord have mercy on the fate of this movie
D G A E
And God bless the mind of the man in the street
[Chorus]
D A E F#
Help all the rednecks and the flatfoot policemen
B D A E
Through the terrible functions they all must perform
D E D E
God help the winos, the junkies, and the weirdos
N.C. E
And every poor soul who's adrift in the storm.
[Refrain]
D A G A
Help everybody, so they all get some action
D A G A
Some love on the weekend, some real satisfaction
[Bridge]
D A
A room and a meal
E F#
And a garbage disposal
D G
A lawn and a hose'll
E A
Be strictly genteel
[Verse 2]
D A E F#
Reach out your hand to the girl in the dog book
D G E A E
The girl in the pig book, and the one with the horse
D A E F#
Make sure they keep all those businessmen happy
D G A
And the purple-lipped censors and the Germans of course
[Refrain]
D A G A
Help everybody, so they all get some action
D A G A
Some love on the weekend, some real satisfaction
[Bridge 2]
D A
A Swedish apparatus
E F#
With a hood and a bludgeon
D G
With a microwave oven
E A
"Honey, how do it feel?"
[Detuned Section]
D A E G
Lord, have mercy on the hippies and faggots
Fm B D
And the dykes and the weird little children they grow
C
Help the black man
D
Help the poor man
E
Help the milk man
E
Help the door man
N.C. E
Help the lonely, neglected old farts that I know
D
A
E
[Spoken Part]
N.C. E
They're gonna clear out the studio
N.C. E
They're gonna tear down all the...
N.C. E
They're gonna whip down all the...
N.C. E
They're gonna sweep out all the...
N.C. E
They're gonna pay off all the...
[Build up]
E
And then...
E
And then...
E
And then...
E
And then...
[Outro]
E
Hey hey hey, everybody in the orchestra and the chorus
E
Talkin' 'bout every one of our lovely and talented dancers
E
Talkin' 'bout the light bulb men
E
Camera men
E
The make-up men
E
(The fake-up men)
E
Yeah, the rake-up men
E
(Especially Herbie Cohen, yeah...)
E
They're all gonna rise up
E
They're gonna jump up
E
I said jump up
E
Talkin' 'bout jump right up and off the floor
E
Jump right up and hit the door
E
They're all gonna rise up and jump off!
E
They're gonna ride on home
E
They're gonna ride on home
E
They're gonna ride on home
E
They're gonna ride on home
N.C.
And once again
N.C.
Take themselves
N.C. E
Seriously, yeeeah!
E
Two, three, four, seriously
E
They're all gonna go home (ye-hey!)
E
Through the driving sleet and rain
E
They're all gonna go home
A
Through the fog, through the dust
E
Through the tropical fever and the blistering frost
A
They're all gonna go home
A
And get out of it as they can be, baby
E
And the same goes for me
E
(The same goes for me)
D A
Oh, yeah!
D A
Oh, yeah!
D A
Oh, yeah!
D A
Oh, yeah!
E
And each and every member of this rock oriented comedy group in his own special way
E
Is gonna get out of it as he can be
E
We all gonna get wasted
E
We all gonna get twisted
E
We all gonna get wasted
E
We all gonna get twisted
E
And I am definitely gonna get...
E
REAMED
E
'Cause I'm such a lonely
E
I'm such a lonely
E
A lonely, lonely, talkin' 'bout a lonely guy!
N.C.
Oh, and I know tonight, I am definitely...
N.C.
I am positively...
N.C.
I just have to get...
D A E
BENT, REAMED AND WASTED
N.C.
A disaster area the size of Atlantic City, New Jersey!
The rest of the song is random.