E D/F# Ab C#7 F#m B7 A C#m E7 Am C G Em
Verse 1
E Ab C#7
Tom Cruise is so in love with Katie
F#m B7
At least all his people tell him so
E Ab C#7
And while he thinks that she's a very special lady
F#m B7 Ab
It's probably not the way he'd choose to go
A E F#m C#m
And a lifetime of longing looks would cause too much distraction
A E B7
Good thing that he's not gay anymore
Chorus
E Ab A E
Tom Cruise is Tom Cruise crazy
F#m B7 E B7
Just be glad it's him not you
E Ab A E
If you had Tom Cruise's troubles
F#m B7 Ab
You might be Tom Cruise crazy too
C#m E7
You'd flash your big white shiny smile
A Am
You'd buy expensive shoes
E Ab C#7
But you'd be the only man on Earth
F#m B7 E
Who couldn't enjoy Tom Cruise
C#7 F#m B7 E (re-intro)
Oh no you couldn't enjoy Tom Cruise
Verse 2
E Ab C#7
Tom Cruise is always getting older
F#m B7
He knows he'll never be that young again
E Ab C#7
And when Tom Cruise looks back over his shoulder
F#m B7 Ab
He sees a thousand younger leading men
A E
He knows someday he'll have to play
F#m C#m
An old retarded grandpa
A E B7
While someone younger plays his sexy son
Chorus
E Ab A E
Tom Cruise is Tom Cruise crazy
F#m B7 E B7
Just be glad it's him not you
E Ab A E
If you had Tom Cruise's troubles
F#m B7 Ab
You might be Tom Cruise crazy too
C#m E7
You'd flash your big white shiny smile
A Am
You'd buy expensive shoes
E Ab C#7
But you'd be the only man on Earth
F#m B7 E
Who couldn't enjoy Tom Cruise
C#7 F#m B7 E (re-intro)
Oh no you couldn't enjoy Tom Cruise
Bridge
C G Am Em
Tom Cruise knows somewhere there's a place for him
C G Am B7
He's not of this world anymore
Verse 3
E Ab C#7
Somewhere in some secluded castle
F#m B7
Poor Tom Cruise sits staring at the wall
E Ab C#7
And the outside world is always such a hassle
F#m B7 Ab
Sometimes he won't go out at all
A E
There are millions who know his name
F#m C#m
Everybody loves him
A E B7
Why is it that he feels so alone
Chorus
E Ab A E
Tom Cruise is Tom Cruise crazy
F#m B7 E B7
Just be glad it's him not you
E Ab A E
If you had Tom Cruise's troubles
F#m B7 Ab
You might be Tom Cruise crazy too
C#m E7
You'd flash your big white shiny smile
A Am
You'd buy expensive shoes
E Ab C#7
But you'd be the only man on Earth
F#m B7 E
Who couldn't enjoy Tom Cruise
C#7 F#m B7 E
Oh no you couldn't enjoy Tom Cruise