Am G
The Count has an eye on his ankle
F E7
And lives in a horrible place
Am
He wants all your money
G
He's never at all funny
F E7
He wants to remove your face
C G
And you might be thinking what a romp this is
F E7
But wait till you meet his accomplices
Am
When you see Count Olaf
G F E7
You're suddenly full of disgust and despair and dismay
Am G
In the whole of the soul of Count Olaf
There's no love
F E7(Trem.)
When you see Count Olaf count to zero
Am G
Then scream and run away
F E7 Am
Scream scream scream and run away
G
Run run run run run run run run
F E7
Or die die die die die die die die
Am G
Run run run run run run run run
F E7
Or die die die die die die die die die die die
Am G
Two women with powdered-white faces
F E7
And one long nosed bald man with warts
Am G
Things worsen and worsen there's a hook-handed person
F E7
And others with nastier parts
C G
This evil and unpleasent group
F E7
Completes Count Olaf's acting troupe
Am G
The goal of Count Olaf is getting control of
F E7
The fortunes of urchins and orphans hooray
Am G
I mean horrors Count Olaf is no laughing matter
F E7(Trem.)
When you see Count Olaf count to zero
Am G
Then scream and run away
F E7 Am
Scream scream scream then run away
G
Run run run run run run run
F E7
Or die die die die die die die die
Am G
Run run run run run run run run
F E7 Am
Or die die die die die die die die die die die
Where it says, "Trem." rub your index finger rapidly over the strings at the base of the neck.