[Intro]
A
A E D E
[Verse 1]
A
His girlfriend's at wit's end, but they want to try again
E
He's tried to ask how do they make some breakup mutual
A
It's not like they could write a note then climb on a bike,
E
Ride into the wide blue and forget what they've been through
D
She's a bitch and he's a dick
She makes him sick, he makes her frantic
E
So faking like they'll ride into the sunset's not romantic
[Verse 2]
A
So what should they do?
N.C.
Could they just shut up?
E
They've withstood barbs, lances, sharp glances
N.C.
Still go to shrinks, not dances
A E
It's not my fault that I think suicide's a far cry from useless
E
Confucius would say "fuck this," chalk deuces
D
She thinks their relationship could use an injection of commitment
E
So how 'bout brains on pavement?
E
Permanent's an understatement
A E D E
[Verse 3]
A
So how do I go through this shit?
E
No, I'm not used to fights, bashes, wounds, gashes
Heartbreak, attacks, rematches
A
Not to say I'm OK
E
I've shown my share of contained enragement
Adjacent to their tear-filled complacence
D
I think they should take some time to be apart, reflect, rewind
E
But that's no option when they both say that they're fine
[Interlude]
G# A A#
[Verse 4]
B
Fuck this, I'm not taking it
This song's devoted to commitment
F#
We're sick of all the whining, no one cares, no one can stand it
E
An automatic rifle in their mouth's the best prescription
F#
We're all so glad we've come to such an eloquent decision
B F#
So thank you, your undue attention's helped me see who I care for:
Myself more than them
E
Just try to ignore my portents
F#
Important life lessons aren't absorbent, like towels or bowels
B
I'm too drunk to form vowels
[Outro]
B