G C
I met her in a Dollar Store in southern Illinois
D G
She moved into my trailer with her little girl and boy
G C
We watched the Jerry Springer show and smoked some cigarettes
D G
Then she hurt me like I never will forget
D G C
She’s gone to Effingham and she took the f’ing kids
D D7 G
And hit the f’ing road in her f’ing Mini-Van
G G
Now I’m sitting here alone, and I don’t f’ing understand
D G
Why my baby’s f’ing gone to Effingham
D G C
Now I long to see those cut off jeans and pigtails in her hair
D G
And breathe her sweet perfume, it hung like ether in the air
G C
If she’d just give me one more chance I’d do my very best
D G
But a man can’t be a man on house arrest
D7 G C
She’s gone to Effingham, yes she packed her f’ing clothes
D G
And took her DVD’s and her f’ing videos
G C
Now she’s called the f’in law, and I don’t f’in give a damn
D G
‘Cause my baby’s f’in gone to Effingham
Interlude
G C
Now if I could only see her and explain the way I feel
D G
I’d tell her that I’m sorry, and I swear this time for real,
G C
A restraining order shouldn’t have to break my heart in two
D G
She needs me she just hasn’t got a clue
G C
She’s gone to Effingham, yes she took the f’in kids
D G
And hit the f’in road in that f’in minivan
G C
Now I’m sitting here alone, doin’ the best I f’in can
D G
Since my baby’s f’in gone to Effingham
D G
Since my baby’s f’in gone to Effingham