Am
Early Monday, the call went out.
"Get your Westbrook boys before it sells out.
The Bittner had an idea and he was on his way,
To get an extra allotment of that beer that day.
Am
He rolled on out to Big C's
"Just grab and go" he thought, it'll be a breeze.
But he didn't know that the way it would go,
Am/B
would be heard all over Orlando
C
C'mon and raise a toast
Am
for the sucker that lost the most
G
and remember that you can't win
E Am
When you steal an Evil Twin.
Am
Walked through the door and down the aisle
Miller and Bud? Nah that crap is vile
what he was looking for was a special beer
one that only comes but once a year.
Am
There it was at the end of the line
a maple bourbon stout that is so divine
He grabbed a bottle, then he grabbed two
Am/B
No one could guess what he was about to do.
C
C'mon and raise a toast
Am
for the sucker that lost the most
G
and remember that you can't win
E Am
When you steal an Evil Twin.
Am
He looked around, then zipped down his pants
But it tell ya, it wasn't for romance
a bottle went down, his zipper went up
He went to the register to settle up.
Am
$45 plus tax was hist bill
but he still left with one hell of a deal
Think of all the money he saved,
Am/B
too bad the cameras were on that day.
C
C'mon and raise a toast
Am
for the sucker that lost the most
G
and remember that you can't win
E Am
When you steal an Evil Twin.
Am
Word spread fast on the internet
There were the pictures, as clear as they could get
The Reckoning at Big C's
Buying beer from now on wouldn't be a breeze.
Am
Now I share these words not to scare
but just to warn you to pay for your beer
Stealing beer ain't a good gag
N.C. Am Am/B
Plus no one wants to drink with a douchebag.
C
C'mon and raise a toast
Am
for the sucker that lost the most
G
and remember that you can't win
E Am
When you steal an Evil Twin.