G F# Am D
My father cut his toe off
G F# Am D
In a rotary lawn mower
G D Em
And my mother burst a blood vessel
Am D
When my younger brother went to jail
G D Em
So I told her not to worry
Am D
Not to get in such a flurry
G D Em
We're just an ordinary family
Am D G C G
With the usual calamity
G F# Am D
When I was just a virgin lad
G F# Am D
My mother faked a suicide
G D Em
Because she found the tell-tale sign
Am D
Of puberty upon the sheets
G D Em
So I told her not to worry
Am D
Not to get in such a flurry
G G D Em
We're just an ordinary family
Am D G C G
With the usual calamity
C D G C G
We always try to look our best
C D G C G
We always take care when we dress
C F# Em G
We always wear clean underwear
C Am
In case we're in an accident
D D
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, true
True, true, true, true, true, true, true, true
G F# Am D
When I become a married man
G F# Am D
With children of my very own
G D Em
Will I lay my inhibitions on
Am D
And criticise their sexuality?
G D Em
Will I use them to protect respect?
Am D
Will I try to own them flesh and bone?
G D Em
Or will I be their equal friend
Am D
Encouraging their new ideas?
G D Em
For the future lies within their hands
Am D
And the salvation of all these lands
G D Em
Yes, the ordinary family
Am G D
Is the only way to set us freeeeee
C D G D
Set us free, set us freeeeee
C D G D
Set us free, set us freeeeeee
C D G
Set us free, set us free