No 1 in the UK charts in 1986. Various key changes, as noted, throughout this song.
Intro = C G C G
Verse 1
C F
It's the time of year now that spring is in the air
G C
When those two wet gits with their girly curly hair
F
Make another song for maronic holidays
G C
That nausiate ate ates in a million different ways
F
From the shores of Spain to the coast of southern France
D G
No matter where you hide you just can't escape this dance
Verse 1
G C G
Hold a chicken in the air stick a deck-chair up your nose
C
Buy a jumbo jet and then bury all your clothes
F
Paint your left knee green then extract your wisdom teeth
C G C
Form a string quartet and pretend your name is Keith
Up 1/2 tone
Verse 2
A D A
Skin yourself alive learn to speak Arapaho
D
Climb inside a dog and behead an eskimo
G
Eat a Renault 4 wear salami in your ears
D A D A
Casserole your gran disembowel yourself with spears
Bridge
D G
The disco is migrating the sound is loud and grating
E A
It's truly nauseating let's do the dance again
Up 1/2 tone
Verse 3
B E B
Hold a chicken in the air stick a deck-chair up your nose
E
Yes you'll hear this song in the holiday discos
A
And there's no escape in the clubs or in the bars
E B E
You would hear this song if you holidayed in Mars
Up 1 tone
Verse 4
C# F# C#
Skin yourself alive learn to speak arapaho
F#
Climb inside a dog and behead an eskimo
B
Now you've heard it once your brain will spring a leak
F# C# F#
And though you hate this song you'll be humming it for weeks
Outro up 1/2 tone to fade
D G D
Hold a chicken in the air stick a deck-chair up you nose
G
Buy a jumbo jet and then bury all your clothes
C
La la la la la la la la la la
G D G
La la la la la la la la la la la la