[Verse 1]
F Em
I heard there is no Christmas
Dm C
In the silly Middle East
F Em
No trees, no snow, no Santa Claus
Dm C
They have different religious beliefs
Dm Em
They believe in Muhammad
F Em
And not in our holiday
Dm Em
And so every December
F G
I go to the Middle East and say
[Chorus 1]
C C
Hey there Mr Muslim
C G
Merry Fucking Christmas
G G
Put down that book the Koran
G C
And hear some holiday wishes
C C
In case you haven't noticed
C F
It's Jesus's birthday
F G
So get off your heathen Muslim ass
G C
And fucking celebrate
[Verse 2]
F Em
There is no holiday season
Dm C
In India I've heard
F Em
They don't hang up their stockings
Dm C
And that is just absurd!
Dm Em
They've never read a Christmas story
F Em
They don't know what Rudolf is about
Dm Em
And that is why in December
F G
I'll go to India and Shout
[Chorus 2]
C C
Hey there Mr. Hinduist
C G
Merry Fucking Christmas
G G
Drink Eggnog and eat some beef
G C
And pass it to the missus.
C C
In case you haven't noticed
C F
It's Jesus's birthday
F G
So get off your heathen Hindu ass
G C
And fucking celebrate!
[Verse 3]
F Em
Now I heard that in Japan
Dm C
Everyone just lives in sin
F Em
They pray to several Gods
Dm C
And put needles in their skin
Dm Em
On December 25th
F Em
All they do is eat a cake
Dm Em
And that is why I go to Japan
F G
And walk around and say
[Chorus 3]
C C
Hey there Mr. Shintoist
C G
Merry Fucking Christmas
G G
God is going to kick your ass
G C
You infidelic pagan scum.
C C
In case you haven't noticed
C F
There's festive things to do
F G
So lets all rejoice for Jesus
G C
And Merry fucking Christmas to you.
F G
On Christmas Day I travel 'round the world and say
F Em Dm C
Taoists, Krishnas, Buddhists, and all you atheists too,
F G C
Merry Fucking Christmas, To You!