[Intro]
C C Am F
[Verse]
C G
I'm sitting on the back of the football bus
Am G6 F
All the lads are wearing shorts and shin pads
Am G6 F Bb G
Talkin' ‘bout the game they're gonna win this afternoon
C G
And all this display of masculinity,
Am G6 F
Well it's making me feel a bit nauseous
Am G6 F Bb G
So I close my eyes and I pray it'll be over soon
C G Am F
Now I have never functioned well at a competitive sport, I just can't find the fun
Am C F Bb G
And besides, I'm far too paranoid about the way I look when I run!
F G
So I sit here combing my hair
E Em
Trying my hardest not to stare
G F
But it's getting colder
Em
Then the whistle blows
D (two bars)
G Bm
I will never be Captain, but I will be King
C D
And I'm gonna achieve the most wonderful things
Em D C D
That don't involve playing football in the rain
G Bm
I will never be one of the lads in the team
C D
But I'll conquer the system and fight for my dreams
Em D C
And I don't know if I could ever win –
D G Bm Em D C D G
But I'm gonna be the best there's ever been
C G
Johnny is the head of our football team
Am F
He always boasts to his friends about women
Am G F Bb G
I wonder if he'd carry on that way if I told them all the places we'd been in
C G Am F
And Johnny struts around on the football pitch with an arrogant smirk on his face
Am G F Bb G
But he wears a smile of a different kind when he comes to stay over at my place!
F G
And I'll sit there combing my hair
E Am
While he's taking off his underwear
G F
And it's getting warmer
Em
'Til the whistle blows
D (two bars)
G Bm
Johnny is captain and Johnny is King
C D
And his parents are hoping for wonderful things
Em D C D
That don't involve him screwing ‘round with me
G Bm
Johnny's the best-looking lad on the team
C D
All the guys want to be him, he's every girl's dream
Em D C
And no, I don't think I will ever win –
D G Bm Em D C D G
But I'm gonna be the best there's ever been
C G
I'm sitting on the back of the football bus
A Am F
And I wonder will it ever change?