“Middleman”
by John Prine
from the album Common Sense
[Intro]
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[Verse 1]
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I was sitting in a diner with a girl named Flo
A
She wouldn't say yes, but she couldn't say no
E B7 E
She said, "Darling, can I get a middle man?"
E
She was engaged to a fellow on the lay-a-way plan
A
But she carried all her money in a coffee can
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She said, "Darling, can I get a middle man?"
[Bridge]
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The cook looked over with a short order face
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Dropped a fork and he saw Flo's legs
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Straightened his apron and burned my eggs
B7
I got competition everywhere I go these days
[Verse 2]
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Leaning on the juke box lookin' real good
A
Like Natalie Wood on a Pontiac hood
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I said, "Darling, I think I need a little hand.
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Ya see, I've seen my downs, I've seen my ups
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I seen miniature dogs in coffee cups
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But darling I ain't never seen a middle man."
[Bridge]
A
Flo talked slow like real wet paint
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She said, "A middle man's there when the other ones ain't
A
He's got a left handed manner that leans to the right
B7
Sleeps all day and keeps it up all night"
[Verse 3]
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I got an aunt in Ohio and a boat that won't row
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Some veterans insurance and nowhere to go
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"Darling, can I be your middle man?"
[Bridge]
A
If I could get the money in that coffee can
E
I could open me up a lemonade stand
A
Send all the kids off to Pakistan
B7
Make Flo happy if I can
[Instrumental]
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A B7
[Verse 4]
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Jerry Mahoney and Johnny B. Goode
A
Are gonna buy me a house in Hollywood
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Darling, I think I got the perfect plan
E
We're gonna save half a dollars and sell 'em to France
A
Buy us a record and learn how to dance
E B7
And darling, I'll always be your middle
E B7
Darling, go buy a griddle
E B7 E
Darling, I wanna be your middle man